When my husband and I lived in Fort Worth, Texas, our trips home were something we always looked forward to. We missed our family and friends here in Georgia, and we waited and prayed for the day that God would bring us back closer to home. I wonder if Jacob anticipated moving back home while he was living with Laban? Absence and time has a way of "romanticizing" our memories. I can imagine that, after all Laban put him through, it was very easy to imagine the grass being greener back home.
Regardless of how he felt over the years, I bet that as he started home, every troublesome memory and worry came flooding back. With every step Jacob's trepidation probably grew. How will he be received? What will happen? He was obviously repentant and felt bad about what he did to his brother. Either that or he was just afraid of him. Jacob sent elaborate gifts Esau's way to try and placate him. He made provisions to protect his family (showing obvious favoritism...but that's a whole additional post). He did all that he could do, but even that wasn't enough to ease Jacob's mind.
This is the first time we really see Jacob pray. God spoke to him before, but here we see Jacob actually seeking God out and reminding him of His promise. And then we see Jacob wrestle with "a man". The "man" was God, and Jacob wouldn't let him go until he blessed him. I find it amazing that God "couldn't overpower him." Obviously, God could have. And God could have easily gotten away. God had made promises to Jacob- promises that He couldn't fulfill if Jacob was dead. Perhaps God didn't want to get away. I believe that He wanted to bless Jacob, but was waiting to see how badly Jacob wanted the blessing. Because he persevered, he received it.
The times when worry or dread threaten to overcome me are when I am alone, in the dark of night, trying to fall asleep. Jacob was in a similar situation. I'm guessing you may have been there too. What do you do then? Do you wrestle with God? God has made promises to us as well. He wants to bless us. God wants to be our blessing. He wants us to want Him badly enough to persevere in seeking Him out. I don't know what your "road home" looks like, but I hope in includes a few "wrestling matches" with God along the way. If we persevere in our spiritual life, just like Jacob (now Israel), we'll find forgiveness, blessing, and the conviction we need to "struggle with God and with man and overcome." (32:28) That puts a whole new spin on my prayer life!
Isn't it interesting that the name God chose for Jacob and for His chosen people was "Israel" which means "he struggles with God?" The Lord knows, it was a fitting name for that nation, as well as for us today. It's amazing that the God of the universe draws near to us, and waits to be "struggled" with.
I've always said you might not be able to always control what happens in your life but you CAN control how you respond to it. Struggles and hard hits in life are always a chance to draw closer to God. Reading Ch. 32:28 is like an amazing light bulb moment for me. Perseverance in times like that (or "struggles with God")are opportunities to grow and intensify intimacy with God. I have been thankful for some of my "wrestling matches" and sleepless nights.:)
ReplyDeleteSo well said Kelly! Ditto. :) I also wanted to make sure that I clarify. We can't "bend God" to our will. No amount of praying- no special words- or brave blind declarations will "convince" God to do what we want Him to. That's not what the wrestling with God is over. It's just like Kelly said- it's an opportunity to increase intimacy. We wrestle more with ourselves and giving God what He wants of us, and in the end we are blessed if we are still holding on to God saying "don't leave me!" He never will. Amen.
ReplyDeleteIn "The Truth Project" by Focus on the Family, Dr. Tacket said that there have been certian issues in his life that he has gone into a "cocoon" over while he "wrestles with God" about a certain matter. I love the imagery of that because I see me and God in an intimate, tightly enclosed area, "working out your salvation with fear and trembling". Dr. Tacket said that he would not come out of this "cocoon" until God had revealed Himself to him and he had worked out the issue with God. There have been a few key points in my spiritual maturity that I have done this exact same thing with God. Two of these issues are the unresolvability of God's sovereignty and man's free will given by God as well as the fact that many people are deceived by Satan into THINKING they are Christians but they show NO evidence in their lives that they are. Only God knows the heart, but "faith without works is DEAD". I was in a "cocoon" with God about these two particular issues for about three YEARS! After having come out of these "cocoons", I feel so much closer to the Lord and I feel that He has blessed me for my perserverance in struggling and "working out" these issues. I absolutely LOVE Jeremiah 33:3 which says, "Call to me and I will answer you and tell you great and unsearchable things you do not know." As Natalie said so well, it absolutely BLOWS MY MIND that the God of the universe desires that we do this with Him. ABSOLUTELY INCREDIBLE!!!!
ReplyDeleteI AM AMAZED AT HOW JACOB LINED HIS FAMILY UP TO MEET ESAU. HE KNEW WHO HE LOVED THE MOST AND PUT THEM AT THE BACK OF THE LINE. I WONDER WHERE I WOULD RANK IF GOD LINED US UP.
ReplyDeleteTHEN THEY FINALLY GET HOME AND BOOM HIS DAUGHTER IS RAPED. HER BROTHERS KILL ALL THE MEN AND JACOB IS WORRIED ABOUT THE PEOPLE LIKING HIM. HE HAD JUST WRESTLED WITH GOD AND HE KNOW GOD WAS GOING TO SEE HIM THROUGH. WE HAVE ALL BEEN WRESTLING TO PLEASE GOD AND BE PUT AT THE BACK OF THE LINE.
JUST KNOW THAT GOD LOVES YOU AND HE WILL GO TO BATTLE FOR YOU.
GOOD NITE
I have "wrestled with God" over the past 2 years about situations dear to my heart. I feel that going through these situations have drawn my family and me closer to God. We are still "wrestling" with answers, but have a peace that passeth ALL understanding. The daily blog is great! Encouraging!
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